Posted by: irisgodd3ss | August 2, 2007

Happy Happy, Joy Joy

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I haven’t disappeared, nor have I slashed my wrists in desperation. That’s way too dramatic, even for this drama queen. I’ve simply been lying low. I figured I’d let the hostilities die down before I write something new. It was a smart move, if I may say so myself. The last comments I received were positive and rather supportive. Indeed, the haters were bound to find someone else to hate, and I pity the poor soul that they’re devouring now.

It may sound like a case of sour grapes, but I can honestly say that getting fired was the best thing that ever happened to me. I realized that teaching really wasn’t for me, so now I’m doing what I do best and what I love most. I’m now writing freelance full-time.

To be honest, it’s not really the kind of writing I’d like to be doing, but I’m making a decent living out of it so I can’t complain. It won’t make a millionaire out of me anytime soon, but I’m not exactly destitute either. I earn enough to keep myself in the lifestyle that I’ve been accustomed to. The best thing about it is the mobility it gives me. I can do this anywhere in the world as long as there’s Internet access, which is exactly what I’ve been doing for the past week.

I flew to Penang last Thursday to get my 60+30-day tourist visa. I stayed for a couple of nights, and I was supposed to head back to Bangkok on Saturday when I decided on the spur of the moment to head for Phuket, where I met up with my friend from Cebu, D, who’s visiting his sister in Bangkok. We were supposed to spend 2 nights in Patong Beach, but we decided at the last minute to go to the Phi Phi Islands and Ao Nang in Krabi instead. I just got back to Bangkok yesterday morning. It was my first taste of backpacking and it was surreal. I was doing exactly what I’ve been dreaming of doing all my life. And I wasn’t idle the whole time, mind you. I was writing almost half the time, trying to keep up with my deadlines. However, that didn’t stop me from enjoying the trip as best as I could. I was tired, scruffy, badly sun burnt, and my legs were unshaven. I’ve never been so happy in my whole life.

I know I can’t do this forever. I know at some point I’ll have to think about security and my future and all those serious things that my grandmother keeps shaking at my face, but I have time. I won’t be in my 20s forever, after all. I want to look back when I’m old, wrinkly, and toothless and remember that I did exactly what I wanted to do, that I was free, and that I didn’t conform to the mediocrity that society demanded. These are my glory days. It doesn’t matter how long it will last as long as I’m experiencing it.

My life is nothing short of idyllic right now and I’m just enjoying the peace that comes with it. I’m doing what I love most and seeing places that I’ve only ever dreamed of. I’m also seeing a wonderful man who respects my boundaries, and for the first time in a long time, it’s something that might actually go somewhere. I’m finding a lot of things to smile about these days.

I’m pragmatic enough to know that happiness is fleeting and sooner or later I’ll be back in the muck. It’s perfectly alright. As temporary as happiness may be, well, so is misery. They’ve said it all. When a door closes, a window opens. When you’re down, there’s nowhere to go but up. When it rains, it pours but you can always count on a rainbow. Indeed, the comfort that comes with knowing and believing that is priceless.

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Responses

  1. the last time i called home, my mom asked me about my pension plan!!! hahahahaha!!!!
    i think we are on the same boat (so to speak), enjoying the moment, foregoing the impending worry about retirement plans! but, really, there are so many people who are not as happy as you are, who can only dream of what you are doing…so you know, enjoy travelling and when things get murky, well, you can always teach english! hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

  2. im crushed but glad you are happy

  3. Me too. CRUSHED. Devastated… but, I’ll go sit on the beach and suck down strawberry Walls icecream to get over you. Lol. Great post – keep them coming. STOP laying low – I don’t like when you’re laying low.

  4. waaaaaaaahh!!! good for you!

  5. my friend once told me in that one can never have both money and time…

  6. RIVA: I have lots of time and just enough money to live and travel a bit. That should be alright, right? LOL.

    ZEE: It’ll be your turn one day, sweetie. For now, do well on that board exam, you and my sister.

    VERN: Not lying low anymore. I’m back with a vengeance. LOL.

    CHICOBLAZE: If I’m the drama queen, you’re the emperor.


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